Monday, June 17, 2013

How Are We Even Friends?!

***This post is dedicated to all my friends who seemingly have nothing in common with me but love me anyway.***

Sometimes I'm slow in realizing things everybody else figured out years ago, but the realization ends up changing my life so I feel pretty smart anyway.

Last week, I made the incredible discovery that most of my closest friends have [almost] no common interests with me. Most of them cannot be described as a passionate "dancer, pianist, foodie, singer, American history nerd, old movie buff, and jazz lover" (see sidebar). And I am really bad at, terrified of, or not interested in kayaking, Shakespeare, wakeboarding, canyoneering, skiing, etc. We have different groups of friends. Some of them live far away and I haven't seen them in years! Sometimes we don't talk for months but when I need someone to talk to, they're right there. So what keeps us together??? I've boiled it down to these 2 things:
1) Our love of the Gospel - We view life and the world through Gospel lenses. We turn to the Gospel to solve problems. We share our insights and hard-earned lessons. We share useful scriptures/talks/quotes with each other. We pray for each other. We love the Lord and our Savior and remind each other that They love us too. We are determined to be faithful til the end and help each other to do so. I'm so grateful for friends who are spiritually as well as emotionally and socially strengthening.

2) They care - It really comes down to this. I've met so many people that I think I would get along well with due to common interests, but it feels strained or awkward because they don't really care to get to know me. The ones who become close friends simply CARE about how I'm doing and love me for who I am. They ask how I'm doing and listen intently. Even if they don't understand what I'm going through, they try and they empathize. The give me tough love and throw my own advice back in my face when I need it. They are patient with my weaknesses and insecurities. They believe in me and value our friendship.
Compatible senses of humor help too. I can't completely relax around someone unless we've shared some laughs together.

Case in point, Britt and I met just over a year ago and hit it off. She became my first real friend in DC. We bonded over being "3rd culture kids", our "permanent tourist" zest for life, and our tendency to photographically document everything we do. We were excited to have found someone to go exploring with but quickly started realizing how dramatically different we are with our tastes in music, TV shows, movies, clothes, books, politics, and more. But we got over our little crises and kept hanging out. We learned which topics to avoid haha (i.e. we didn't vote for the same person in the last presidential election). The miracle is...our friendship keeps growing! We had so much fun riding bikes on the Mount Vernon Trail and eating Thai food when we first hit it off that we did the exact same thing to commemorate our "1 Year Friend Anniversary"!
Sometimes I wonder how the heck we're even friends...and then I become flooded with gratitude that we are.

3 comments:

  1. Could not agree more with this post. :)

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  2. Omg ur gonna make me cry. I love you so much, chica! This post means more to me than u can imagine! I love that we share a deep devotion to the gospel and some really great laughs, and bonding moments (though that last one's mostly over dumb boys). This really warmed my heart. I wonder the same thing someone's! Haha But then I thank Heavenly Father for our awesome and bizarre and abiding friendship. :)

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  3. And I completely agree with those two points.

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