Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Productively Unemployed

The job hunt this summer has been especially tough, expectedly. Not just because of the economy but also because I'm a lot pickier. I refuse to do food or sales because of horrid past job experiences, though I may have to relent on the food jobs if I get really desperate! I'm looking for receptionist/clerical jobs and applying online everyday...

Meanwhile, I try to stay busy during my unstructured days at home. I have close to 0 friends at home, thank goodness for Candace. The rest are in Utah taking summer classes, on missions, married or traveling. I'm trying to stay productive and stay on the positive side. I'm very grateful for my optimistic nature in bleh times like these!

Find the good and making the most of my down time:

- Lots of family time! Hanging out with my super cool bro, Chris, almost everyday. He's gonna be a teenager next week, I gotta stay close to him during these next tumultuous years!

These are some of the many pics we took on a boring long car trip :D




- My parents are grateful for how "helpful" I am around the house. Frankly, I feel like I need to contribute to compensate for my free rent somehow.

- Plenty of sufficient sleep! I'm sleeping in til I naturally wake up - usually a rare luxury! This means I sleep for about 9-9.5 hours each night. Lovely results include flatter tummy (research shows hormones released during sleep help burn fat instead of storing it), smoother skin (cell repair plus less stress), and a less naughty appetite (body secretes less of a chemical that makes you crave bad carbs, sugar and fat). I will enjoy this treat while it lasts.

- Self-motivated daily exercise. Since I don't have my dance classes scheduled in, I have to practice self-discipline and drag myself out of bed every morning (I like to exercise on an empty stomach and get my metabolism fired up for the rest of the day!) and choose which home DVD I'm putting on haha. I alternate between dance aerobics, pilates/yoga and weights.

- Quality scripture study time. I listen to a General Conference talk every morning during breakfast, then look up whatever scriptures I feel prompted to afterwards. I'm sure the Lord will reward this effort somehow!

- 2 words: Food Network! Aka educational entertainment - getting cooking ideas for college single life and my future as a wife/mother.

- Reading for fun, which is almost impossible during the school year. I'm currently gonna start Gross National Happiness by Arthur C. Brooks, who gave a phenomenally inspiring forum at BYU this last semester. Plus I have plenty of authors I want to explore, all of whom I was introduced to in my American Literary History class.

- Picking back up my piano practices. I'm learning Clair de Lune right now.

- Catching up on my movie list. Recently saw He's Just Not That Into You, liked it. Also want to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and 17 Again, but also Sleepless in Seattle and Steel Magnolias for the first time haha - can't neglect the classics!

- Learning Microsoft Excel and Outlook. It's not like I can't figure it out for myself in proper time but I'm desperate for a [clerical] job, for which these skills are critical. I went to a job agency who sent me some assessment tests. I can type fast but I failed pathetically in Excel (51%) and Outlook (57%)! But the nice lady, Candice, didn't give up on me. She sent me some online tutorials, which will hopefully make me competent enough to land some decent jobs now and help me in the future.

So there. I'm trying to enjoy all this free unstructured time but I am eager to start earning money towards next year. PRAYERS APPRECIATED!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

30s Club

April 8, 2009

*all names have been changed

It all started with wanting that dang ballroom concert shirt, which couldn’t be bought but had to be earned by selling at least 30 tickets for concert. Now that I look back, I realize I didn’t even really want the shirt itself (I didn’t like it when I saw it), it was just the idea of the shirt as a souvenir and proof that I was a part of the company and performed in the concert. I guess I wanted to show it off. I became engrossed in selling enough ticket and it became super stressful. I hounded all my friends and asked some of them repeatedly. I was thinking about my own glory instead of benevolently wanting them to come enjoy the concert.

Eventually, I got 30 tickets to my credit and started contacting people to get the money and give them their tickets. When I asked a girl in my English class, she said she actually wouldn’t be able to go because her bank account only has $0.50 in it and she doesn’t have enough money for the rest of the semester. I was so shocked at first that I just said “ok”. I said I already paid for it and she said she’d try to see if her sister would want to go. Afterwards, I became really indignant. I mean, who does that?! They write their name, I buy the ticket, they pay me back – that’s how it worked and I was very upset that she went back on the agreement. So I started to frantically search for another person to buy it.

A few days later, she said her sister was willing to pay for it to help her out, so I said ok, though I still didn’t really trust her or her sister. Then my friend Stuart*, who I’d already sold tickets to, said his friend would want to buy the extra ticket. I was so excited, prayer answered. I called the girl in my English class and told her nevermind, don’t worry about it. She was happy. But then Stuart’s friend realized that it was a Saturday matinee ticket and he had wanted a Friday night one like Stuart so they could go to dinner together before the concert. So now I was again, stuck with a bum ticket. I asked and reasked many friends and classmates to no avail.

Forward a week or so, the week of the concert. I was contacting the last people who needed to pay me and receive their tickets. I went to a concert with Mandy where I saw one of the girls who also bought a single ticket. I greeted her and told her I had her ticket, whenever she wanted to exchange. She said she thought I forgot about her and went and bought her own ticket. I was shocked again but this time I actually became angry. I said I already bought it. She looked passive and said, Well sorry we’ll both try to find someone to buy it. I wanted to shout, “But I bought it for you because you specifically told me you wanted me to! Do you know what I’m going through just to sell the other one?! And now I have another bum single ticket to sell, which is not next to the other bum ticket, so nobody will want to buy it. Ahhh!!!” Of course, I didn’t say it out loud. I tried to remain calm but what upset me the most was her faultless attitude, like “oh well, too bad for you”. I griped to Mandy but managed to enjoy the concert.

On the walk home, I called Derek to vent. He sympathized but couldn’t talk long. After I got off the phone, I really tried to evaluate the situation. I was surprised by my lost of temper. Then I remembered the one of the recent General Conference talks. The speaker said he never asked why or complained during a trial, rather, he asked God what he was to learn from it. I remember doing this before and it helped me endure better. So I wracked my brain for what I could possible learn from this. I know anger blocks the Spirit, so I calmed myself down sufficiently to receive revelation. The thought came to me that this happened because I was being selfish and greedy, using people just to get that dumb shirt, which I didn’t even like. I also realized that this was a lesson about materialism. I wanted that worldly item so bad, but when I got it, I found it less than fulfilling and not as great as I’d expected. I was really tired of selling tickets, so if I don’t end up selling these 2 single ones, I figure this lesson in greediness and selfishness had cost me $20 to learn.

After I got home, I posted the tickets for sale at half the price on my Facebook status. Then Ethan took me to go grocery shopping. I expressed to him my frustration about the whole situation. He told me he learned not to trust people not too long ago, and it had cost him several hundreds of dollars. He had signed up for a housing contract because the seller said they would throw in a few hundred dollars and bonuses. Ethan kept hounding him but never got the money. So then I felt a little better; it only cost me $20 to learn my lesson about selfishness.

When I got home, there were several offers for my tickets. One even offered to give me full price for them (!). However, my friend Dorothy said her and her sister would love to have them. I asked if she were willing to pay the full price since I didn’t want to have to lose money if I didn’t have to. She said she couldn’t and got really excited when she saw my post only because her and her sister couldn’t afford the full price and weren’t gonna go. I said (well, typed, on Facebook chat) she had to go cuz she’s a ballroom dancer herself and it’s an incredible experience! Meanwhile I was being tempted to sell my tickets to someone else for full price. This was clearly a character test. Heavenly Father seemed to be asking, “Did you really learn a lesson about selfishness? Here’s your chance to prove it by helping out someone at a price to you. What’s more important? People or money?” I knew I had to do the right thing or God’s going to give me another harrowing experience to truly learn the lesson. So I said I’d sell it to her and her sister cuz I really wanted to go. She hesitantly asked if I was sure, and I told her yes, bring the $10 tomorrow and it’s a deal. (This was about 2-3 days before the concert)

She was really happy and grateful, I was really happy and grateful because I realized that Heavenly Father is the most amazing planner/teacher ever. He made it possible for me to sell 30+ tickets, get that dumb shirt, learn a lesson about selfishness, save $10 on learning that lesson (I only lost $10 instead of $20!), AND help give 2 sweet girls the opportunity to watch the ballroom concert. I am so blessed to have gone through this.